SAGINAW, MI—Recalling the time he and his partner fired dozens of rounds into the shoplifting suspect’s body, local police officer Bradley Denney reportedly pointed Monday to the unarmed white man he killed once to prove he’s not racist.

“Look at all the people I’ve brutally beaten and killed before judging me, alright?” said Denney, who pointed to his pristine disciplinary record as further evidence of his lack of bias. “It doesn’t matter if you’re white, Black, Asian, or Hispanic; I’ll shoot you. I approach every civilian with the same number of bullets in my chamber, regardless of skin color. I mean, I shot that guy nine times in the back. Would a racist do that? And he was definitely white. Well, we found that out afterward. The lighting wasn’t very good at the time.”

At press time, Denney admitted he initially thought the man he had gunned down was biracial.

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