SANTA CLARITA, CA—Saying that the terrifying image was still seared into her brain, local mom Jeannine Kirchner called her daughter Tuesday in a panic after she had an ultra-realistic nightmare she cut off her beautiful hair.
“Oh my God, I had the worst dream last night, where I was just sitting on my couch and then all of a sudden you texted me and told me you cut six inches of your gorgeous locks,” said Kirchner, adding that when she finally saw her daughter in the dream, her hair was up by her chin, which didn’t compliment her face shape at all. “I don’t know, it just felt so real, you know? Not to be dramatic, but you just worked so hard to grow out your hair after that awful bob you got a few years ago. Promise you’ll never cut it like that again, or dye it, or get one of those haircuts where you shave the side of your head. Okay?”
At press time, Kirchner let out a blood-curdling scream when her daughter revealed that she had, in fact, gotten bangs yesterday.